This post is all about my second pregnancy journey — how we went from trying naturally, to miscarriages, to finally using our frozen IVF embryos… and now expecting our baby 🙂
If you’ve been following me for a while, you probably remember my first pregnancy story, where I shared our experience with unexplained infertility, surgery, and eventually conceiving naturally.
This time, the journey looked different.
I’m currently in my second trimester and finally feel ready to share. I waited until I was past the first trimester because, after everything we went through, I needed time to feel grounded before announcing anything publicly.
This isn’t an eating disorder recovery post — but it is a real life update. Fertility struggles can happen regardless of ED history, even after full recovery like in my case. And I want to share honestly what this year looked like behind the scenes.
Also… yes, we now know the sex of the baby. I’ll share that below 🙂
Deciding to Try Again
Our son is now three years old, and I always knew I wanted a second child. Initially, I planned to wait until he turned two before trying again. I wasn’t in a rush. I assumed that since we had solved the fertility issue the first time, the second pregnancy might happen more easily.
But time has a way of shifting perspective.
As I’m approaching 40, I started feeling more aware that I didn’t have unlimited time. So when my son was about 1.5 years old, we began trying.
At first, I tried to stay relaxed. But after several months without success, I began tracking ovulation more closely. After about half a year, I contacted the same fertility doctor who had helped me before. She wasn’t overly concerned yet, but given my history, she agreed to run tests.
Everything looked normal — except for a possible polyp again.
In March 2025, I had surgery to remove it.
The First Pregnancy… And First Loss
After surgery, I got the green light to try naturally again. And on the very first try, I got pregnant.
I felt hopeful. Maybe this was it.
But something didn’t feel right. I had red spotting, which I didn’t experience in my first pregnancy. The pregnancy tests weren’t getting darker. At six weeks, I miscarried.
I remember sitting at the clinic on a Saturday, bleeding, anxious, alone — my husband was home with our son. The ultrasound didn’t match the gestational age. Deep down, I already knew.
I cried. Of course I cried.
But because I had sensed something wasn’t right, it didn’t completely break me. It was more disappointment and confusion than shock. I allowed myself to grieve, and then I kept going.
Chemical Pregnancies and Emotional Exhaustion
In August, I saw another positive test. But again, spotting started and my period came a few days later — what’s often called a chemical pregnancy.
Then in October, something similar happened again.
By that point, I felt emotionally exhausted. The cycle of hope and disappointment was draining. Every month felt heavy.
That’s when I knew it was time for plan B – the IVF.
Turning to Our Frozen IVF Embryos
Before our first child, we had gone through IVF due to unexplained infertility. We created four embryos but never needed them because I conceived naturally after surgery.
Those embryos had been frozen for three years.
Now, it felt like the right time to use them.
Originally, I planned to attempt an embryo transfer in January if natural conception didn’t happen. But by October, continuing to try naturally was starting to affect my mental health. So I contacted my fertility doctor earlier.
We missed my ovulation window that month, so we waited until late November 2025.
A few days before ovulation, I started progesterone. At the beginning of December, we went in for the embryo transfer.
The procedure itself was simple — about ten minutes. I was awake the entire time and it wasn’t painful.
During the transfer, I repeated a mantra silently to myself:
“I trust the universe. I trust nature. I trust my body. I trust the little soul of this baby.”
It helped me release control over what I couldn’t control.
The Stressful Waiting Period
After the transfer, the waiting began.
That week, I went on a weekend cruise to Sweden with a friend and our toddlers. It was fun but exhausting — I barely slept sharing a tiny bunk bed with my son.
When we returned home, he developed a fever and then fever cramps. He turned blue while sitting with my husband. My husband called emergency services.
We had experienced fever cramps once before, but it was still terrifying.
When I arrived at the hospital that evening — already emotionally drained — I had some bleeding.
In that moment, I felt sure I was miscarrying…again.
I was exhausted. Overwhelmed. I thought my body couldn’t handle all this stress.
Thankfully, my toddler recovered quickly. The bleeding stopped. But the anxiety stayed.
The Faint Line
By Sunday, my period was four days late. I suspected I might be pregnant but was afraid to test.
When I finally took a test with my husband, the line was faint.
Instead of joy, I felt guarded. Faint lines had meant loss before.
I had an hCG blood test scheduled for Tuesday. That morning, before leaving for the hospital, I took another test.
At first, I thought there was no line. Then I noticed one. I compared it to the earlier test.
It was darker.
That was the first small spark of hope 🙂
After the blood test, I went to a café to work while waiting for the call. After a few hours I opened my phone to check the patient portal and noticed the time — 11:11.
Right then, my phone rang.
It was the doctor’s assistant confirming that I was pregnant — and that my hCG levels looked good!
I can’t describe that moment properly. It felt surreal. Like I could finally breathe :’)
Releasing Years of Anxiety
After that call, I felt a level of exhaustion I hadn’t felt in years. Not even physical — emotional.
I realized how much tension I had been carrying since we started trying again. Maybe even since 2019 when we began trying for our first child.
Finally hearing good news allowed me to drop my shoulders and exhale.
We told a few close friends and my parents over Christmas. We waited longer to share with extended family because of our previous losses.
Then, at the end of December, the real pregnancy symptoms hit.
January was rough. I was extremely tired and nauseous. That’s why I took a break from social media — I needed space to rest and focus on my health.
Thankfully, now I’m feeling much better and everything is progressing well.
It’s a…
Over the past few weeks, we’ve had several scans and tests. The baby is healthy — and we found out the sex.
It’s a girl 🙂
I would have been happy either way, but since we already have our beautiful son, adding a daughter to our family feels incredibly special. I’m so excited for this new chapter.
Pregnancy at 40 & Life After Recovery
I’m turning 40 this year. Being pregnant at this stage of life feels different — maybe more grounded, more aware of how precious time is.
And I want to say something important.
Going through fertility struggles again brought back old anxieties. But I’m deeply grateful that I no longer have an eating disorder in the background making things harder.
Life can still be uncertain.
There can still be stress, grief, waiting, fear.
But recovery gave me resilience.
If you’re walking through something similar — fertility struggles, loss, waiting — you are not alone.
And if you’re in recovery, know that life continues after healing. Hard things can still happen, but you’ll meet them from a much stronger place.
Final Thoughts
I wanted to write this both for you and for myself. Sharing helps me process and honor the journey.
Thank you so much for being here and for supporting me through all the chapters — recovery, motherhood, business, and now pregnancy again.
If you’d like to follow along more closely, I’m most active on Instagram right now. And I’ll continue sharing updates when I feel ready.
Thank you for reading. ❤️
